


A Neepian Surprise

by Melisande



Series: The Neepian Series [2]
Category: Brokeback Mountain (2005)
Genre: Au!Au, Humor, M/M, Mpreg
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2008-05-07
Updated: 2008-05-07
Packaged: 2017-10-12 11:11:51
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,732
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/124247
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Melisande/pseuds/Melisande
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The Neepians find a way</p>
            </blockquote>





	A Neepian Surprise

**Author's Note:**

> This is a sequel to The Neepian Solution. It will not make any sense unless you've read that. Which is not to say that it will make sense if you have read it. But if you can go along with aliens abducting Jack and Ennis for the Greater Neepian Good, and then . . . It was a bunny that wouldn't quit. I blame the aliens.
> 
> Thanks to cathalin for everything, and right now for the beta and hand-holding.
> 
> Warning: Mpreg

  
"David Jack del Mar!"

David walked across the stage, long and lanky, his graduation gown flapping in the cool Oregon summer breeze. He shook hands with the president, turned to flash a grin at his parents, and proceeded to join the rest of the class of '89.

"Can't hardly believe it," Jack said, shifting to sit closer to Ennis. "Our little boy, a college graduate."

"Me, neither," Ennis said, leaning against Jack for a moment, then straightening up. "And on his way to medical school."

Jack and Ennis were so proud they practically shone with it, but so was every other parent there, so it went unnoticed.

"Who would have thought," Jack said, bored with the ceremony now that David had done his piece, "back in Wyoming . . . "

  
* * *

  
No one would have thought. After they'd been dropped off by the spaceship, after Ennis had come to Jack in the tent, neither had thought much for the rest of the summer. They'd been busy. Later on, in August, when Neep had come back to talk to them about a little cow and calf operation, Jack had been all for it, without having much idea of what Neep was talking about. He'd understood the important part: him and Ennis ranching up.

Ennis had been skeptical.

"Ice-cream?" he'd said, squinting.

"Ice-cream!" Neep agreed enthusiastically. "Ship?" he asked, pointing a tentacle to the sky. "Word machine."

Ennis and Jack looked at each other. "C'mon, Ennis, won't do no harm to hear the man - er - hear him out."

"Yeah, alright," Ennis said, unable to resist Jack's pleading eyes. "You're gonna take care of the sheep, right?" Ennis asked Neep as he carefully put out the fire.

"Sheep!" Neep agreed. "Ready?"

And then they were up with the sheep. The same two Neepians as before - maybe, who could tell? - came running up. They were wearing cowboy hats, which reassured Ennis. He cast an eye over the sheep, which were scattered nicely. "Okay," he said.

"I dunno, Jack," Ennis said, when they were in their old room on the spaceship. "Ice-cream? And besides, they still want to, you know." He blushed, looking down. He couldn't get comfortable with the idea of the Neepians making movies of him and Jack doing stuff together. But he also couldn't get comfortable with the idea that the Neepian race might die out because Ennis del Mar was a chicken.

"We could try it out," Jack said. He wasn't really thinking about Neep's proposal to set him and Ennis up with a little dairy farm/ice-cream operation at the moment. He was thinking about how good Ennis looked in his striped pajamas, and about how big and soft the bed was, and about how the two might be combined. He had several ideas that he wanted to put into action immediately. "Let's sleep on it, talk about it in the morning."

"But, Jack - " Ennis started, then broke off when Jack tackled him to the bed. "Whoa, there!" he said, and after that, all was silence except for the snorting and laughter.

So at breakfast the next morning, Jack and Ennis weren't ready with an answer for Neep.

"Run it by us again," Ennis said, pouring maple syrup over his waffles. Ennis liked to know what he was getting into, and he already had one thing going on that he didn't understand. He wasn't about to get into another.

"We like ice-cream," Neep said. "Very much. We are unable to produce it on our planet, because we cannot sustain the cows." He paused, and Ennis and Jack nodded. Clear so far. "Our scientists, working with Earth products, have developed an ice-cream so far beyond the dreams of Lucerne that . . . allow me to demonstrate." He waved a tentacle and a robot rolled in, bearing bowls of ice-cream. "Try it," Neep said.

"Fuck," Jack said, blue eyes wide as the sky. "That's - that's good." He took another spoonful. "You like it, Ennis?" He turned to Ennis, who was licking his ice-cream, eyes closed, a blissful expression on his face that Jack hadn't seen there since last night.

"Yeah," Ennis said, still licking. "It's good, alright. But that don't explain how this thing would work. Me and Jack, living together?"

"Yes." Neep kind of nodded, except, not having a neck, he nodded his whole blobby blue body. But he got his point across. "Do you have an objection to living with Jack, Ennis?" He looked Ennis in the eye, keeping another eye on Jack and the third on his ice-cream.

Jack waited anxiously for the answer. He and Ennis hadn't talked about the future, because Ennis always clammed up when Jack even hinted at what would happen when they came down off the mountain. Jack had dreams, though.

Ennis, his head down, looked sideways at Jack for a second, then returned his eyes to his waffle. "No," he said, so low Jack could hardly hear him. "Not Jack. But - "

Jack's heart leapt and started doing a dance, or that's what it felt like. Ennis wanted to live with him! He'd more or less said it!

"Ah," Neep said. "Your human societal structure." He nodded again. "I cannot advise or assist you with that. I can tell you our proposal, however. We will provide you with enough earthling tender for land, cows, and a dwelling, as well as the ice-cream recipe. In return, you will give us half of your ice-cream production." He sat back and waved to the robot for more ice-cream, which brought it quickly. Strawberry this time. Neep dug in, but Jack and Ennis were full of waffles and chocolate ice-cream.

"Ennis - " Jack said, then fell silent. "Neep, me and Ennis need to talk it over." Jack thought he saw Ennis relax a little - his shoulders dropped away from his ears, anyway. "How about you drop us off now, come back next week?"

"Very well," Neep said. "But first, may I take a picture of you together? It will be published in the Daily Planet, our major newspaper."

"Sure," Jack said, and Ennis didn't object when Jack slung an arm around his shoulders, even managing a smile for the camera-thing.

  
* * *

  
"Say ice-cream!" Ennis and David smiled, David relaxed and easy, Ennis a little self-conscious in front of a camera, even one held by Jack, but so happy and proud it didn't matter. "And now one of the three of us, hey, will you take a picture of us?" Jack said to a random student walking by, who agreed readily enough. They posed against the pick-up, David in the middle, wide grins on all three faces, and that turned out to be the best picture from David's graduation day.

  
* * *

  
In the end, Ennis couldn't stand to let the Neepians die out, so he'd agreed to let them make movies of him and Jack, on the condition that no one ever talked about it to him or even looked at him sideways about it. That lasted until Jack, as a birthday surprise, got a few tapes from the Neepians and a VCR from Radio Shack.

Ennis was sitting in their living room, full of birthday cake and good feelings, when Jack started the tape.

"Whut the fuck?" Ennis said, starting up from their shared recliner. Jack pulled him back down.

"Sshhh," Jack said. "Just watch for a minute."

Ennis, grumbling, watched. After a while, he stopped grumbling. Pretty soon he started murmuring into Jack's neck, and then there were groans, and maybe, though he'd never admit it, a moan or two. And from that time forward, there was grown-up movie night at the del Mar/Twist household.

  
* * *

  
"We got it all?" Ennis asked, looking at the overloaded truck and then at David's little Civic, riding low to the ground with all the books and god-knows-what he was taking home.

"Yup!" David said, cheerfully. "Let's get going." He opened the door, jumped in, and honked a few times. Ennis shook his head, smiling, and got into the truck with Jack. "He's yours, alright," Ennis said, like there was ever any doubt.

  
* * *

  
"Whut?"

"A child," Neep said again. "Our scientists have discovered a method whereby you and Jack can reproduce."

"Fuck me," Jack said, and it didn't produce the usual response in Ennis's brain and other parts.

"It is highly desirable that you pass on your genes," Neep added. "Let's have more ice-cream."

"Uh, no. No thanks. We gotta talk about this," Jack said, heading for their room. Ennis followed close behind.

  
* * *

  
That conversation led to others.

"Jack, just shut up for a minute and listen. You're the one who talks to people, you can't disappear for months."

  
"I can do it over the phone."

Ennis frowned, and Jack made a lip-zipping motion. And then they went through the whole argument about who was going to have the baby yet again.

"No, you can't! You know it's gotta be in person!" Ennis didn't mention that Jack's back had been bothering him more and more. He didn't think Jack's back would stand up to having a baby, not to mention his knees and hips, also busted up.

"Yeah, well, you think you can manage the farm when you're six months pregnant? The hands are going to notice!" Jack didn't mention that, given how uncomfortable Ennis still was with people thinking he might like guys, Jack was worried about how he'd feel about being pregnant.

More pointless arguing and bluffing followed, getting louder, until Ennis yelled,

"Are you saying I'm not man enough to have a baby?"

After a silence during which they both listened to that question echo, they burst into laughter, had some whiskey, and spent the rest of the evening enjoying each other's manhood.

Finally, Ennis came up with an argument that silenced Jack, "Look, Jack, I know you're not that interested in having a baby, and I am. You're only doing it for me."

This was almost true; Jack had never been interested in having children, but the thought of having one with _Ennis_ was a bit different. Still, he couldn't deny the basic truth.

"Alright," Jack said. "Alright."

  
* * *

  
"And then Uncle Neep picked you up again and took you to the spaceship?" David, age five, had demanded the story over and over, and at age twenty-two was demanding it again. Probably something to do with the fact that after this summer, he'd likely be gone from home for good, up in Portland at the med school.

"Yeah, the Neepian doctors were always around, poking and prodding and sticking their noses - well, they don't have noses, but, anyway - "

"And a good thing they did!" Jack said.

  
* * *

  
"Do something!" Jack, frantic, yelled at the Neepians. "This is your fault!"

The baby wasn't due for two months yet, but that afternoon Jack had walked into the barn to find Ennis curled up on the ground by the door, blood spreading slowly in the dust around him. Almost before Jack's knees had hit the ground, Neep was there.

"We go," he'd said, and they were in the ship, in the hospital part where Ennis had been getting the check-ups he complained about so bitterly. He wasn't complaining now, though, just lying there, so white, freckles standing out. Then another contraction hit and he was screaming. The Neepian doctors surrounded him.

"They will perform the Cesarean," Neep said.

Jack nodded. He and Ennis had read up about it after Neep said that was probably how it'd go. They'd also read Doctor Spock. They both disagreed with him.

"But there are certain complications," Neep said.

"What the fuck do you mean, complications?"

"Come outside, I will explain," Neep replied, putting a tentacle around Jack's shoulders to guide him out of Ennis's room. He led Jack to a chair, got him a cup of coffee, and sat down next to him.

"Is Ennis - is he - " Jack said, his voice shaking. He stared intently at his coffee, though he wasn't seeing it. It was shaking, too.

"The doctors tell me that both Ennis and the baby will be fine," Neep said.

The rush of relief made Jack almost sick, it was so intense. "Well, then!" he said, "Everything's fine!" He made to go back to Ennis, but Neep held him back.

"There is a thing, Jack," he said. "You and Ennis cannot have any more children."

Jack didn't give a fuck about that, so he shook off Neep's tentacle and headed for Ennis. When he got there, Ennis opened his eyes and smiled at Jack. His face was tired and drawn, his hair lank with sweat, his eyes huge in his pale face. He had never been more beautiful.

"It's a boy," Ennis said, his voice hoarse from the screaming. "We did it."

"Good job," was all Jack said, but his eyes were filled with tears. He reached for Ennis's hand as Ennis drifted off to sleep.

Later, when Ennis was better, though they were still staying in the ship, Jack had to tell him what Neep had said. By that time, Jack had gotten to know David, and had seen Ennis with David, and he was worried that Ennis would take it badly.

"So, David's it," he concluded. "We can't have no more kids."

"One's enough," Ennis said, cuddling David in one arm and Jack in the other.

  
* * *

  
"And that's how you came to be here," Jack said.

"Thanks, Dad. Dads," he corrected himself, raising his glass to Ennis. "Someday I'd like to see the ship, you know," he said, repeating another childhood request. Jack and Ennis had decided it was best if he didn't run around telling tales of alien marvels, so from David's birth on, Neep had always visited them at the farm, except for a few times when David was away at summer camp. "And maybe even see their planet!"

"Well, about that, son," Ennis started out.

  
* * *

  
It had taken a while for Jack to talk him into it.

"Jack," he'd said, "I traveled way the hell to Oregon with you. I ain't about to go to the Small Magellanic Cloud. Besides, what about the cows, and the new flavor launch?"

Jack, talking fast and a lot, had soothed these concerns, and then they'd gotten down to it.

"These guys, they've been watching us all these years, and they'll be looking at us, and they'll know, and . . . "

"Neep's got that all taken care of," Jack said. "They won't bother us. We'll just be hanging out with Neep and Niana and the kids (Jack and Ennis were godparents to all of Neep's children, as he and Niana were to David.)

"But aren't we heroes or somethin' to them?" Ennis asked, gnawing on his thumb.

"Yeah!" Jack said, fired up at the thought. "They love us! They were gonna have a parade, and we'd be in the first float, and . . . " He broke off, seeing Ennis's expression: something like horror. "But I said no! But c'mon, Ennis, it'll be fun. David'll be gone, the farm can get along without you for a few months, and the business can get along without me. Another planet, Ennis!" He was so eager, almost bursting with enthusiasm.

"We'll see," Ennis mumbled. They both knew that they'd talk about it a lot more, and argue, and that Ennis would end up saying yes.

  
* * *

  
"You _are_ ," David said. "Hey, maybe I could put off med school and - "

"No," his parents said, as one.

"David, you gotta stick it out."

They'd never told him why the Neepians had sought them out in the first place, of course. It wasn't the kind of thing you told your kids.

"Alright," David said, knowing when no meant no. "I think I'll hit the hay." He stretched, tired from the long day. "See you for breakfast."

"We done good," Jack said later as they got ready for bed, weaving around each other with the ease that came from long practice. Jack left the cap off the toothpaste and Ennis put it back on, like always.

"Yup," Ennis agreed, climbing into their bed. "Who would have thought, back in '63, we'd end up here."

"I would," Jack claimed, "only thing I thought about once I saw you there, leaning on Aguirre's trailer."

"Only one thing you was thinking about, that's sure," Ennis said, and reached for him. Jack tumbled onto the bed and into his arms. They kept it quiet, because David was sleeping across the hall.


End file.
